As a single mom taking care of both special needs kids and
my disabled mom, it is extremely important to remember to take the time to take
care of myself. I’ve always said, “You can’t take care of others if you don’t
take care of yourself.” It really took me a long time to figure this out.
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Thankfully I got it figured out before I had kids but I lost
friends when I wouldn’t meet my own needs. I put so much time and energy
helping my friends and making sure they were taken care of that I didn’t leave enough
time for myself. I did not realize that I kept using up my fuel tank for
others, but never once used some of that energy, to refill my tank. A car can
only go so far if you don’t stop for gas. I would always end up snapping and
not able to function.
But all that has changed. I eventually realized the
importance of refueling and slowly found ways to add to that tank. Over the
years, I have amassed a list of various ways to take care of myself and now I
want to share it with you.
1. Journaling
One thing that always brings me closer to empty, is when my
mind is so full of stuff that I can’t focus or sleep. One thought is followed
by another and another. It’s an endless train of ideas, thoughts, worries, and
replays. The best way for me to clear my head when I’m dealing with this, is journaling.
Writing out what ever thoughts are flying through my mind always allows my mind
to rest afterwards. Writing also prevents you from forgetting any new, amazing
ideas you come up with. I don’t know about you but I am super forgetful most of
the time. If I don’t write it down then I don’t remember it. A simple notebook
or even just some clean paper and a pencil is all you really need. Or if you
prefer to use technology you can type it up as well. I’ve used both. I honestly
think I prefer actually writing it out. There is just something about focusing
on my hand looping all the letters that really help center and calm my mind. I
also am able to add sketches to my journal.
2. Exercise
Keeping your body is good physical condition is very
important in maintaining your health and well-being. Even a short walk a few
times a week helps keep your sanity. Exercising releases endorphins, which are
the feel good hormones that your body makes. These endorphins will help
energize and lift your mood. I will load my kids into our double stroller and
hit the block or the mall depending on the weather. I discovered that if we
walk the outside perimeter of my local mall, not going into any stores, it is
about a one mile loop. I measured it once with an app that tracks my walks. I
have yet to figure out a good path in my new neighborhood but I used to have a
route I walked in my old one that was about 3 miles. This semester I plan to
visit the campus gym a few times as well. I will hopefully have a few days a
week with some free time while the kids are at daycare and school and I’m
hoping to use that for a little self-care.
3. Hot bath or shower
When stress starts adding up, a hot bath or shower can relieve
that stress. Whether you like sinking down into a hot bubble bath or letting
the steamy water pound on your back, it can be amazingly relaxing. When I get
the time to actually enjoy a shower or even soak in the tub, I never regret it.
I usually just stand in the shower and let the hot water pound on the sore
muscles in my back. Even if I don’t have the time to soak or enjoy, I take a
moment to let the hot water pour on my back to relax. Even just a couple
minutes is better than nothing.
4. Pamper yourself
occasionally
One way to really take care of yourself is to pamper
yourself. Getting your nails done… Having a makeover… Getting a massage… All are
different ways to pamper yourself. Everyone enjoys a little pampering. This is
an obvious method of self-care. It is spending time on yourself. I don’t get to
do this often but I never regret it.
5. Listen to music
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Everyone’s taste in music is different but most people enjoy
listening to some kind of music. Music feeds the soul and refills your inner
tank. We turn music on to give me energy when I need to complete some
housework. Added bonus is when we just decide to have a random dance party in
our living room. If I’m feeling sad, I turn on some old school Linkin Park or
Evanescence and jam out my sorrow. There is just so many different types of
music. You can find one to fit every mood and situation.
6. Eat a balance diet
Everyone knows that you have to eat a healthy balanced diet
in order to stay healthy. You have to stay healthy in order to take care of
others. If you are not healthy, then you will not be up to doing much for
anyone else. A healthy diet needs to consist of mostly a variety of vegetables
and fruits with healthy whole grains and small portions of meat. Portion
control is also key. Over eating can cause a lot of not fun discomfort.
7. Stay hydrated
Water is key to life. Staying hydrated allows your body to
function at its best. I am not particularly fond of plain water most of the
time, though. I usually try flavoring some the night before by slicing fruits
and veggies and soaking them overnight to infuse the water. My favorite
combination is lemon cucumber. You can really use any fruit or veggies you
want. You can even use frozen fruit. I also prefer filtered water, so I try to
keep a pitcher to filter my water available.
8. Read a good book
I, personally, love reading. It’s an escape from this
reality into a fantasy one. You can travel the universe, jump through time, or
visit places only found in dreams. Reading can help take your mind off of any
troubles or stressors. It can also just be enjoyable to help you refill your
tank. You don’t have to purchase every book you read. See if you have a good
local library system. Ours here is amazing. We have six different branches in
town each with hundreds and hundreds of books to choose from. We also have the
ability to do an interlibrary loan to get books from other library systems that
ours does not carry. There are also ebooks that you can read. You don’t have to
spend any money. Amazon regularly has ebooks you can “purchase” for free. Many
times it is a first in a series to try to hook you and encourage you to
purchase the rest but you don’t have to. They do also have single books in
there and they change every day.
9. Get plenty of
sleep at night
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| https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/good-nights-sleep |
Sleep is when your body regenerates from all the wear and
tear of the day. Your body and mind can’t function without rest. Sleeping at
night is important too. Your body creates a hormone, melatonin, at night to
naturally help you sleep. Sunset and the low light level triggers melatonin
production. You also don’t want to be watching any screen late at night. The
blue light from the screen tricks your brain into thinking it is still daytime
and doesn’t produce the melatonin needed to put you to sleep.
10. Treat yourself to
something decadent
Lastly, treating yourself to something that you really enjoy
like your favorite dessert or treat. Even healthy diets need a splurge
occasionally. Just whatever is your favorite. Currently I am really enjoying
ice cream sandwiches and Swiss Cake Rolls. Don’t go overboard or you end up
with the same issues if you don’t eat a healthy diet.
